Last time I was single, over 4 ish years ago, there was no such thing as a ‘fuck boy’, there were just dick heads that you would steer clear of. Then last year, I saw the term getting banded around on social media. I always thought the girls who go after these guys are absolute idiots who must know full well what they are getting themselves into. Just like the same idiots who chase after bad boys constantly. It turns out i am now in that idiot category.
My ideas of the difference between a fuck boy and a bad boy;
-Exude confidence to the point that it’s contagious
-Unique rebel – will smoke in front of a non-smoking sign
-Claims not to follow trends, then grows a beard and gets a tattoo
-Has a certain cheek that draws you in
-Will flirt with your mates just because he can
-Known for causing trouble or murder with your mates
-Will happily get into a relationship with you, until he finds something shinier to play with
-He’s not one for meeting the rents or making future plans
-Will make no effort to convince you that he isn’t a dick, he totally owns it.
-Their purpose in life is to give you that awesome memory to look back on, that excitement, fun fiery fling to fantasize about when you’re old and not getting any.
-Will reel you in with comments of your future until you are convinced it’s going somewhere, even if it’s an offer to go to Nando’s next month
-Will constantly compliment you while your together, then not speak to you for weeks
-Randomly requests nudes and you know full well they will be shown to his mates
-Appear cheeky and cute, can only hide the dick head undercurrent for at least 3/4 dates
– Speak only in emojis, like the water splashes, tongue and especially that poor, violated marrow thing
– Use terms like ‘dick appointment’, because he is a twat.
-Has the ability to make you forget why you stopped talking, or exchanging emoji’s
-Pretends to be a nice guy but only cares about himself
– Usually very hot, and they know it
-Their idea of flirting is – what would you be doing if I was there now? Or in their vocab – wha wud u be doin if I was ther?
– Their purpose in life is to lead you on and play with your feelings more than they play with you.
My advice to any ladies dating either..
Have that hot, fiery fling with the bad boy, you will need that to reminisce on. Also, you need that one guy that your mates can keep bringing up after every night on the wine.
If you must pick from the fuck boy tree, treat him the same. There is nothing wrong with a disposable fling, don’t book that table at Nando’s and whatever you do, don’t use that poor marrow plant emoji in conversation!!
To summarise, you know what you are getting with a bad boy, a fuck boy however, is a bit of a snake. I am usually such a good judge of character and bin them off as soon as I get a hint. Although I have to admit, like many others have fallen into the trap of one, hooked on good vibes, the promises of future outings, having amazing nights together and wondering if you could give up your beloved freedom for them. This is not me at all. I can control my emotional beans for ages, these fuck boys are damn good, damn hot and are actually damn likeable. Now i have learnt to play the game and play it well. Also, these strange alluring creatures are found mostly on Tinder.